American Baby-Boomers are perhaps the most death-denying generation in human history.We grew up in a post-war boom that probably will never see an equal. It gave us a feeling of superiority, invincibility and immortality. It was, in a sense, a Disneyland idea that life was always going to get better. It just was inconceivable that we would die so we’re trying to lie, cheat and steal our way. Septuagenarian marathons, face fillers and surgery and reinforced denial are some examples. And part of the situation arises with the contempt of younger people and social isolation of the aging.
It's not like that around the world. Traditional Asian cultures, for example, are inclined to venerate the elderly for their decades of acquired insight and wisdom. The U.S., a younger country with an equally young ethos, does not show the same respect. In fact, I have been ignored in social gatherings by my children and a strong message was that I would be taken care of as long as I could "pull my own weight." Can I trust them with my well-being with that attitude when I really decline?
My approach isn't to look for the life everlasting, or confront the bleakness of the universe, or hide from the realities of my body. It is to cultivate the same attitude I have relied on for almost 50 years; Curiosity. In overcoming personal difficulties I sought an inner peace, in physical problems Yoga Insight, and with relationships there were therapists to help investigate. I am convinced that my seeing clearly by looking at what is, not what I or others want, is crucial to a content old age. Damned exciting stuff!
I shun those around me who dispense ready platitudes and bromides about my not being old. Oddly they can be of any age. It seems obvious to me that it is they who are uncomfortable and would like me to not really be me but the forever young version they prefer in front of them. I am what I am. And I can deal with it. Save your well meaning phrases, please.
As I enter my 80th year I'm feeling a pull back from the very physical and active life I've been leading up to this past year. I'm fortunate to have been able to do it all. This year I'm cutting back on exercise, long bicycle touring and late nights. We'll see how driving a car and my motorcycle go this summer. International travel has been getting more difficult. The anxiety and uncertainty of changing visa regulations, international conflicts, airport checks and uncertain foreign exchange markets are big factors in enjoying myself while traveling.
I'll just have to see how things turn out.
