When Questions have Negative Intentions

Rhetorical questions, as a cross-breed of questions and statements, represent an effective tool in putting forward the Speaker's ideas, as well as influencing the ideas and opinions of other people. Because of their communicative effectiveness and multifunctionality, they are frequently used in different contexts and for different purposes, not at all benign. Other types of questions can be sarcastic, or designed to open up controversial emotional content, and can close off certain responses and contain misinformation/red herrings to guide people into subtle traps. 

For example, Open and Closed question strategies are used by salespeople to focus attention on the desired product. Being a traveler the intent I run into so often is when someone asks a question to allow them to dominate the conversation with their stories, experiences and opinions. Feeling used, manipulated and exploited are the aftermath of these questions.

Conversational chess players love this stuff!

Positive questions have a wide range as well including:

Intents based on conversational flow

In communication, the purpose of a question often relates to how it drives or affects a conversation: 

• Introductory: Used to begin a conversation and engage with someone. For example: "How's work going?".
• Mirroring: Acknowledges what was just said and reflects it back to the speaker. For example: "Good. How about you?".
• Follow-up: Probes for more detail or information on a previous topic. For example: "What are you working on right now?".
• Switching: Intentionally changes the direction or topic of the conversation. For example: "Did you watch the game last night?". 

Intents based on information gathering

Questions can be designed with a specific goal in mind for the information they gather: 

• Clarifying: Used to confirm or better understand information that has already been shared. For example: "Are we implying that...?".
• Seeking information: The most common intent, used to gather facts and data. For example: "What is the status?" or "Who is involved?".
• Seeking understanding: Deeper than simple information gathering, these questions aim to grasp the meaning behind data. For example: "What does this mean for our long-term plan?".
• Stimulating creative thought: Also known as divergent questions, these encourage imagination or exploring cause-and-effect. They often have no single "correct" answer. For example: "What might have happened if...?". 
• Seeking judgment: Evaluative questions that ask for sophisticated levels of cognitive or emotional judgment. For example: "What are the similarities and differences between...?".

As I look through the 'positive' list I see that they can easily become negative. Also, when the asker takes the answer given as a condemnation, judgement and/or criticism of the hidden idea behind asking we quickly become aware something was off in the first place. In cases like this I am quick to point out the 'slight of hand' involved which usually ruins the game for the asker and pisses them off, having got found out. 

     "The only winning move is 

       not to play."

Becoming aware of how we use, or abuse, questions is an informative way to detect our orientation to others in conversations. Questions from positive intentions encourage consensus reality and trust, negative intentions promote betrayal and lack of trust.